Film Reviews

The Covenant

• Rating:
• Director: Renny Harlin
• Starring: Laura Ramsey
• Details: US / 97mins (12A).

The Covenant is a sickly pale, watered down version of The Lost Boys, but without the camp, tongue-in-cheek humour that made it a cult classic. This film is so lifeless and devoid of anything remotely worthwhile, I became uneasy watching it and wondered was there an ulterior motive to get me into the cinema. Ten minutes in, I realised that my soul and will to live were being sucked out of my eyes by an unseen and malevolent force - and its name is Renny Harlin. The latest misfire in Harlin's legendary canon of crap chronicles the lives of four boys who posses dark powers that come to fruition on their 18th birthday. Their secret is safe until a new boy arrives at the school with more powers than the four put together. That's as interesting as I could make the film sound, and I've been kind. The acting, if that's what you call it, is so bad that you're hoping one of them will turn to the camera and give you a knowing wink, just to let you're in on some twisted joke that made people fork over hard-earned cash for this twaddle, but they never do. With so many signposts and flag-waving going on, you're just left wondering how many talented directors are out there who can't get a gig because people like Renny Harlin are alive.

Review by Gavin Burke